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Moonwashed Weekly Prompt- Revelation

Revelation

My entire life I was told that being fat 

was wrong, made me worthless

Made me ugly and unlovable

The scale

Controlled my worth

I could be beautiful if

I were a just a different size

My sense of humor, imagination,

Endless creativity, boundless kindness

Forgotten

Because my body didn’t fit the mold

That society deemed acceptable

Thirty years of feeling

Unworthy of the love given to me

Thirty years of feeling like

I’m an inconvenience because of my size

Thirty years of swallowing all the things people

Assumed, said, bullied, “didn’t mean any harm by”

Saturating my mind 

I believed it all, every word.

A movement started, slowly quietly

It gained momentum, traction

All bodies deserve love

All bodies are beautiful

Size does not determine worth

Fat online communities developed

Leaders,  influencers, of all shapes and sizes 

Multiplied, took up space, stood tall for those of us

Still trying to be invisible.

Hours of self reflection, years of self hatred

discussed, explored, dissected

Through journaling, books, therapy, poems, safe online spaces

Until my personal revelation,

My eyes opened wide, it all finally clicked

I believe in myself

I’ve always been beautiful

Every size I have ever been

That I ever will be, beautiful

My weight does not reflect my worth

I am worthy of love, respect, to take up space

I am worth knowing, existing, being seen

It’s okay to be happy in this body

Right now and always

I deserved to feel this way

My entire life.

-Nicole Smith, Momoetry

This week’s writing prompt from the genius of Eugenia at Moonwashed Musings is Revelation. To join or check out other’s poetry, click here.

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Published by Nicole Smith

Hi! I am in my 40s. I am a mother of 2, wife, and I work at a local family owned restaurant. I love reading and writing. I write poetry and blog to understand myself and the world around me better.

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